CLAY: The infrastructure bill has been signed, and Joe Biden is on a road tour to try to build support for the infrastructure accomplishment, and, my goodness, I want to play these cuts for you. In New Hampshire, listen and think, “Is this a man that is in complete control of his mental faculties?” I think all of you can tell the answer is no. Let’s start with cut 4.

BIDEN: (slurring) More fires in the West, burned-to-the-ground homes, businesses and forests than the entire state of New Jersey from Cape May to New York City. This is the United States of America, for God’s sake! And why is it happenin’? Well, the severe storms that are knocking down all the wires. Anyway, there’s a lot going on! We have to… This law builds back our bridges, our water systems, our power lines, our grids, and for better and (pause) stronger resilience.

CLAY. Oh, my God.

BUCK: He really is the uncle at the Thanksgiving table who’s actually had a little too much to drink.

CLAY: I don’t think he drinks, but he sounds like he’s drunk all the time now.

They call him Slow Motion Trainwreck Joe pic.twitter.com/JRx32LTan4

— Tom Elliott (@tomselliott) November 16, 2021

BUCK: But he’s kind of muttering stuff like (impression), “Ehhh, ehhh… (mumbling) There’s a porcupine dancin’ on a roof, and there’s a couple apples in an orchard. You go up a tree and boom! Lightning strikes.” He looks around the room and everybody is like (chuckling), “What are you talking about, you utter weirdo? What is he even saying?”

CLAY: It’s always tough when you’re at Thanksgiving and you have a family member who has lost control of their faculties but usually that family member is not making very many significant decisions even for your family. We have that guy in charge of the United States right now. So that was Biden trying to discuss infrastructure. I don’t even know what he was trying to say at the open there, like, all the fires in California and comparing it to the East Coast?

BUCK: The crazier whatever he says is, the more it sounds like he really believes it? You know, all of a sudden he’s like, “There’s fires and there’s bridges and there’s… This stuff is happening all over the country, that’s…” I was like, “Wait. I can’t follow you,” but he gets more into it! He leans into it harder, the less sense it actually makes.

CLAY: And they put so much of this for him on the teleprompter, and he’s incapable of even reading what they’re trying to get him to say. Now, Biden also… That wasn’t it. That was obviously completely incoherent. But he also tried to talk about how to cross a bridge in a snowstorm in New Hampshire. And that didn’t go well, either. Let’s listen to cut 5 of our esteemed leader.

BIDEN: (slurring) Conversations around those kitchen tables that are both profound as they are ordinary. “How do I cross a bridge in a snowstorm?” What happen…? (sputtering) No, think about it. You know, you’re situa… What happens the bridge collapses and there’s a fire on the other side? It’s gonna take 10 miles longer to get to the fire! People could die. I mean, this is real! This is real stuff.

BUCK: (impression) “You’re sitting at a kitchen table all of a sudden the neighbor’s house is getting hit with a flood and you don’t have a raft ready and all of a sudden a porcupine shows up.” What is he even talking about?

CLAY: I mean, this is so bad. This is so… Can we play that one more time? I just want you to listen. This is Joe Biden talking about why his infrastructure bill is so important. How do you cross a bridge in a snowstorm? First of all, I bet just about every single person out there who lives in the Midwest and the Northeast has crossed a bridge in a snowstorm.

The answer is you might go a little bit slower than you ordinarily would, and most of the time the bridge doesn’t collapse, and there’s also not a fire on the other side. Listen to this. This so incomprehensibly bad. Imagine what China and Russia are thinking when they’re getting shared clips of “the most popular president in the history of the nation,” according to the left wing and this media. Listen to this.

BIDEN: (slurring) Conversations around those kitchen tables that are both profound as they are ordinary. “How do I cross a bridge in a snowstorm?” What happen…? (sputtering) No, think about it. You know, you’re situa… What happens the bridge collapses and there’s a fire on the other side? It’s gonna take 10 miles longer to get to the fire! People could die. I mean, this is real! This is real stuff.

BUCK: I like when he gets all folksy about it, too. (impression) “You know, we don’t have broadband for everybody, we struck infrastructure bill and — and a priest, a rabbi and a monk walk into a bar, and, you know, step into my office ’cause you’re fired.” First of all, aren’t you from Delaware? What’s with all the folksy stuff?

CLAY: Also, how about all the hypotheticals? I have kids, and so if you have young kids, they constantly hit you with hypotheticals. Every now and then my wife will just say, “Okay, we can’t have any more questions.”

BUCK: Do your kids ask which animals would win in a fight?

CLAY: Oh yeah.

BUCK: We used to ask my dad that all the time. Who would win, a triceratops or a stegosaurus?

CLAY: Those are great, fun questions. But sometimes they get so detailed that you’re just like, I don’t even know. We’re not sitting around the table having a normal conversation about how a bridge may collapse and there might be a fire on the other side and nobody’s gonna be able to get there. That’s not a normal chat. “Hey, what did you talk about at dinner?”

“Well, how your day went, what would happen if a bridge collapsed in a snowstorm and there was a fire on the other side and people weren’t able to get to it. But now, because of the infrastructure bill, nobody’s gonna die in that fire, in the snowstorm with the bridge collapsing!” This is all really weird stuff, and this is… Honestly, we talked a lot about the 25th Amendment — it was on television all the time — when Donald Trump was president. Guy is a mental savant compared to what’s going on with Joe Biden right now.

BUCK: He used to do two-and-a-half, three hours at a time —

CLAY: Unscripted.

BUCK: — unscripted in a stadium with 60,000 people or whatever.

CLAY: Following every word he said.

BUCK: It was riveting and people would watch it. It was the best thing on TV at the time, and he would say clever and amusing things. It might have been enraged the left, but it was clever, it was funny, it was coherent. And they’re telling us that this is the best they can do, the Democrats? That’s the part of it that I find as offensive as anything else.

Really, guys? This is what you came up with for us for America to unite us, to take us back to normal? This guy who’s yelling about crossing a bridge in a snowstorm and kitchen table conversations? He’s such a phony, Clay. This guy has been living in mansions for the last 30 years. He’s not a kitchen-table, bridge-talk guy.

CLAY: Not only that, Buck, this is the best he’s going to be! His mental faculties are getting worse every single day. With the stresses of the presidency, what in the world does this guy gonna be capable of in 2022 or 2023?

BUCK: That’s why America has Kamala.

CLAY: Oh, God. Maybe the only thing worse than Joe Biden is Kamala. I can’t believe I’m saying that, but I would rather have Biden and his inconsequential meandering idiocy than Kamala and her-flat-out communism. This is awful.